IronTina: Fear NO Lesion

As 2020 begins I have been reflecting on the past year like most. 2019 was a rough one that’s for sure. But not just for me.  My family and many friends have suffered too; loss of a loved one, physical pain, miscarriage, infertility, divorce, cancer diagnosis...  I   have found that a lot of people are suffering in some way. Maybe you. I first have say how grateful I am for those who have reached out to me since I’ve started writing again. THANK YOU.  The kind words, thoughts and prayers are more meaningful than I can write words to portray. I’d also like to speak to those who have commended me for my strength, perseverance, etc. I’ve said to some that I’m a master at silently suffering.  It’s not that I’m attempting to pretend that everything is great. I just doing know what else to do but to keep going. I've never really been a complainer. I treat life like a race; just keep putting one foot in front of ...

Part two  ended recounting my second procedure in Pozań, Poland on Friday 13.September. Most painful IV. EVER.. Entrance to the clinic Paper scrubs. Fancy :-) Warning about the following text: It’s about to get very vulnerable up in here. If  parts one and/or  two elicited tears, well, I warned you. I (found and) re-read  It's all about the blood flow (and Benjamin's) baby!  (post from January 6, 2018) and noticed the following: " To lay it all out there, God met me at the bottom (even though I was SUPER angry and scared), lifted me from my despair to be apart of His plan/purpose for my life." Sounds like I was in a dark place then too...guess it's been awhile down here... Little did I realize at the beginning of 2019 that the hole and darkness was about to get deeper. But notice God met me in that darkness. I'm forever grateful for that. I also wanted to start off by saying that I write this ...

I skipped ahead in the timeline a bit from  my last post  to save (many) people the agony of my life’s minutia…this is supposed to be a recap!   Summer 2018, a friend of mine added me to a Facebook group about Breast Implant Illness. It was around the time I started opening up about my MS diagnosis. I had a lot on my mind. I disregarded it at first but after a chance interaction with a woman one day in January 2019, I began to dig deeper.   Another long convoluted story... In July 2008, I had a breast augmentation for cosmetic reasons. I remember at one of the visits surrounding my surgery, the plastic surgeon told me that in ten years I would need to have the implants exchanged. Well, by March 2019, I was closing in on 11 years with those toxic bags of silicone fixed under my pectorals (chest muscles for those not as nerdy as myself). Anytime I mentioned random/weird symptoms to a physician wondering if there was a relationship to MS, I was ...

6.Oct.2019 marked four years since my “MS” diagnosis. Today, 3.Dec.2019, marks one year from the initial venoplasty that changed the course of my life. What a ride. I've been reflecting a lot lately. 6.Jan.2019 (my last blog post) I wrote about BIG changes I experienced after a procedure 3.Dec.2018.   I’m sad to admit it’s almost been A YEAR since the last post (and you might NOT be able to read them here anymore because my previous posts have disappeared or at least they do when i attempt to search on my desktop...). I can hear my social media manager saying "That’s not the way to keep anyone’s attention and get followers to your blog!!!" Wait, I don't have a social media manager! But, to make an excuse, I’ve been to HELL, literal HELL on Earth. To use St John of the Cross' term: The Dark Night of the Soul. Medically speaking, it wasn’t hospitalizations or near death experiences, but for me worse. Why? Because on the outside, I al...